So today as I was at OOB looking for an article on Sterilization and Women of Color to include in a teaching packet for the newsjournal, I stumbled upon an amazing site called RacismReview.com. I found a perfect article for my purposes but was intrigued by the title of another article “Imaginary Black Men Invoked Once Again”. I read the article which was quite interesting and essentially was an analysis and review of white woman who commit crimes and blamed them on some non-existent black assailant. Although the article was quite comprehensive and insightful, I kept thinking…am I reading a new article from 1945? The one thing that I think was implied but should have been stated explicitly is this new phenomena of white women “blaming” black men for a crime against them is not actually new but a new manifestation of practices commonly employed in the pre-Civil Rights era.

Is this phenomena the new lynching of black men? I must admit, I am not like bell hooks or other feminist who are very keen on focusing on the effects of masculinity/men and especially not keen on being sympathetic and empathetic to the plight of the black man but this is something that is particularly startling and horrifying. It is an obvious fact that in the pre-Civil Rights era, white women were complicit in the system. They did not have access to many human/civil rights (even though they had more than women of color). I argue, although obviously not justify, that because of this lack of power (but yearning for it) that white women saw complicity in racism as an avenue to achieve (white) gender equality. This is proven by the conversations between white feminists/suffragists in the late 1800s/early 1900s and Frederick Douglas (both of which excluded black women). Many of these white women were avid abolitionists and when the slaves were finally emancipated, they looked to blacks (particularly black men) to aid them in their campaign for woman’s rights (at that times mainly the vote). However, many black men, including Frederick Douglas turned their backs on them citing that they were concerned with obtaining voting right for the “negro” (black men). It was at this time that the obvious, perhaps innate racism of reputable feminists such as Elizabeth Cady Stanton were illuminated. Was it correct for Douglass (who was a huge supporter of woman’s suffrage) to support the 15th Amendment although it did not include women citing that it was the “Negro’s Hour”? Was it correct for Elizabeth Cady Stanton to refer to Douglass with disparaging racial remarks because she was angry that he was supporting this Amendment despite its exclusive nature? No. And no. But who was concerned with black women? No one…what’s new? Okay so I am diverting from the topic (I will continue this in a future blog).

The point is that considering the lack of power (white) women had at the time and were actively campaigning for, I can understand (and I say that for lack of a better word, I apologize) why white women may have been complicit in a system of such overt racism to the end of murder. However, what is their excuse now? I am not at all advocating that woman are equal or anything along those lines…but we do have some rights (voting, banks accounts, education). SO what is the excuse for these women to use black men as their scape goats? What have black men (other than ARGUABLY O.J) done to white women that they are so adament about adding to the incarceration rates under false pretenses? I can’t answer fully, I am not a black man, and although overall the rates of black men coupling with white women is not as high as other groups, I see it often enough to feel as though things are all dandy with those two. I would like to see how many men actually do go to prison to this day for such accusations. How many of thse women have had prior relationships with black men (it is just the old, this black man did me wrong so I will take it out on all black men?). Is this the new form of lynching? Further tarnishing the black male name? Further perpetuating myths of the black man as a criminal? As an assailant? As a menace to society? WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS SHIT?!

Not to toot my own horn but I am constantly being approached by men. On the street, in the grocery store, in the library, at a club, on my best day, on my worst day…men just seem to gravitate towards me. I can’t complain fully. It’s nice to be acknowledged as attractive – to know that you have a vast number of options dating wise and so on. However, it can get scary at times as well. I have had a men try to follow me home causing me to divert my path to a safe (a male friend’s house or near a police station) or very public place. I have had men say really lewd things they want to do to me which considering the physical differences most times, have had me fear that I may be sexual assaulted especially raped. But the incident that occurred this week had me thinking more critically then usual. I am so immune now to these kinds of incidents (which don’t just happen once in a day but at least 5 times in a day and sometimes in succession) that I usually just appear more annoyed than I already was and shake my head. Sometimes, I just kind of smirk because I am that embarrassed for these “grown ass men”. But no this incident was quite different.

As I am walking down the street a man in a brand new (obviously) Dodge Magnum pulls up beside me. Mind you, I was on the phone – well pretending to be, something I do when I want people to not bother me although many times it doesnt work – and this man, who looked to be about 27 calls out to me. He was pretty attractive – however – he was not the one driving…he was in the passenger seat. Unacceptable. It reminds me of that TLC song ‘No Scrubs’…you know “hanging out the passenger side/in his best friend’s ride/try to holla at me”. No good. So I continue to walk…they continue to inch with me. Now I am looking around for weapons or someone who may be able to help me because I realized I forgot the mase my best friend gave me some months before. The crazy thing is that most people say I look mean when I am walking in public (which results in men continuously telling me to “Smile”) or that I walk extremely fast as though I am on some kind of mission (which I usually am) but somehow that does not deter them.

SO this man gets the bright idea to hop out of the car and come to my side. FUCK! So i get off the phone. He asks me the usual – name, where I’m from, can he get my number blah blah blah…for some reason these men never ask my age (ah another topic to blog about!). Usually, I ask all the questions they ask me back without actually answering it, and I ALWAYS ALWAYS as for real government names. I will not accept J-Money, Killa, Metaphor etc. as your real name. I cannot bring any legal cases against a J-Money, Killa, Metaphor…child support services cannot track down a J-Money, Killa, or Metaphor (well not that they’re any good at tracking people down who they have full information for either…yet another post topic!). SO after about 5 minutes of letting this fool be near me, I tell him “honestly, please leave me alone. I am not interested”. He does not respect my request and keeps babbling on about how he and his friend just came from doing a show at some (dinky I am sure) venue. Not to mention he said some very lewd things to me which I do not even care to repeat. So I say to him…”hunny, this is sexual harassment. I will not repeat myself again…fuck off”. He looks me straight in my eye and repeats “Sexual Harassment? What are you talking about? This is not the workplace.”

Since when does sexual harassment only occur in the workplace? Am I wrong to classify incidents such as these as sexual harassment? In the five minutes or so I was talking to this (poor excuse for a) man (Finesse), I found out he obtained his bachelors degree at Virginia Wesleyan college and works at Modell’s as a manager. He also does A&R stuff for his rapper friend (Wizard). A college educated black man who works in a professional (enough) setting believes that sexual harassment is solely a workplace invention? And even if it was…that gives you permission to all of a sudden abandon everything you are taught at work about respecting women (and men)?

While the federal government does define sexual harassment as a form of sex discrimination that violates Title VII of the Civil Right Act of 1964 and applies to employers with 15 or more employees, including state and local governments as well as employment agencies, labor organizations, and the federal government, many would not define it so narrowly. At universities and other academic institutions, there are consent clauses which are essentially sexual harassment guidelines which are to be applied to student/teacher or other unequal power pairings. Sexual harassment in my own definition would essentially be in accordance with Title VII sans the narrow scope of the workplace. Sexual Harassment (even by Wikipedia lol) is defined as any unwelcome sexual attention or harassment based on the victim’s gender.

I will end by mentioning the fear men have when you mention words like rape, sexual harrasement, assault, etc. I do not know where this fear comes from yet because I am not convinced that men are fearing the consequences that accompany such acts (because many times there are none). I am also not suggesting that this causes them to have second thoughts and not continue to do such things. I mean I was fully clothed with a guy I was dating (in his bedroom) and he offered me a shot. I said no but he took one. 10 minutes later he wanted me to get in the bed with him which I declined. I am going to mention that he was also about 2 inches shorter than me (but was built because he was a personal trainer) and had a bit…a lot…of a Napoleon complex. Finally, he proceeded to throw me on the bed and get on top of me (still I am fully clothed). I was very scared at this point but I didn’t want to let on that I was, so I say…”What? So you’re going to rape me”? You know how he answered me? “Yes, I’m going to rape you….you would like that right”? and proceeded to try to take my pants off. I am not goin to go into the rest of the story (I was able to escape that situation safely though) but I cite it to prove that the reminder of sexual assault, rape, and harrassement is not always enough to get men to think about their actions and ACTUALLY realize they are committing a crime or just plainly violating another person.

So you might wonder how I got this creep (Finesse) to leave me alone? Well, another thing I had found out in our short lived conversation was that he had a daughter. I don’t like to comment on other people’s situations with their children (especially if I do not know them that well) but for my own safety at that moment it was the only leverage I had. My only weapon that was sure to work. I asked him if he would want his daughter to be accosted in the same way he was me. He was quiet for a not even 30 seconds when he finally mumbled “I’m sorry, have a nice evening” and ran back to his rightful position in the passenger seat of that beautiful Dodge Magnum.